


how to fuck (the patriarchy)

by leona_b



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Feminist Themes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-28
Updated: 2013-07-28
Packaged: 2017-12-21 15:03:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/901662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leona_b/pseuds/leona_b
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry tries to be sexist but doesn't get away with it, duh.</p>
            </blockquote>





	how to fuck (the patriarchy)

Harry cocks his head to one side as you stand there. You watch his eyes scan your whole body, and come to rest right below your- "MY EYES ARE UP HERE ASSHOLE" you shout, and Harry jumps back, a little taken by your strong reaction but turned on nonetheless. "Sorry babe," he says, looking sheepishly to one side. "I'll buy you a drink to make up for it?" He offers, looking into your EYES to see your reaction. "Oh, you couldn't." You say, flattered by his offer but not willing for him to buy your love. "Come on babe," he pushes, walking towards the bar. You walk up to him and pull him into the headlock you learnt at judo the other week. "Oh no you don't, pretty boy." You whisper menacingly into his ear. "It's each to his or her own around here, got that?" Harry whimpers slightly as you hold the position a little longer, waiting for the blood to start draining from his head before you release him. "Good."

2 HOURS LATER

Harry moves his hand to the back of your neck and pulls you close. "You're so fucking beautiful." He whispers as he runs his hands through your hair. You smile, and shift your body so you're facing him. "Yeah babe?" You say "...and what else?" You ask, waiting for a response. Harry stops for a minute and looks at you quizzically. You wait, until finally "uh, you have good boobs?" He offers. "INCORRECT!" You yell, standing up. "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU ONLY TOOK INTEREST IN ME BECAUSE YOU THINK I'M BEAUTIFUL! I ALSO HAVE A BLACK BELT IN JUDO AND A DEGREE IN AFRICAN DRUMMING, BUT YOU DON'T CARE, DO YOU?" Harry's face flushes red and he turns away. "I love you for who you are, not what you look like." He tries, obviously clutching at straws. "Hmph." You respond, as you start towards the door. "Wait babe!" You hear him yell, but it's too late. You are already halfway down the street, singing Beyoncé at the top of your lungs and wondering how long it's going to be until you will become the next female prime minister.

**Author's Note:**

> This is obvs taking the piss out of most fanfics that often portray the male character being in control and assuming the female will just go along with his needs. Where's the mutual consent, guys? I'm sure Harry isn't really like this in real life (I hope).


End file.
